the hardest job I ever had

Kids. They're hard work.  And no one can truly prep you for it. No one can warn you about how much of yourself you will end up sacrificing just in the first five years alone. 

When your one year old wakes up in the middle of the night crying with a barking cough that they just can't stop, you sit in the bathroom while steam pours put from the shower.  Then you take them into your bed and you both sleep sitting up so he can breathe better and rest.

When you are potty training your three year old you don't leave the house for 3-5 days.  Because if you do decide to run a quick half hour errand, that child who has been going on the potty for 2 days will have an accident either in their car seat or on the floor of the grocery store.

When your child wets the bed in the middle of the night, you get up and change him out of his pajamas and make him up a bed of blankets and pillows on your bedroom floor knowing that you will have a couple extra loads of laundry the next day.

When your child throws a huge tantrum in Target and you are the family that everyone is staring at, you have sacrificed all of your humility.  Or worse yet, you have a loaded cart of groceries that you have to leave because of their behavior. (Unless you are the type of parent who can handle a screaming child while grocery shopping. I, personally can't).

Your money is no longer yours.  It goes into all the stuff a baby needs. And then into all the stuff a toddler needs. And then into all the stuff a preschooler needs. And then a nice family car and braces and dance or gymnastics or sports!  

And the car. The nice clean car certainly struggles to remain that way.  Sometimes I just give up.  Honestly, I'd love a spotless car but the war against "car mess" drives me insane!

You sacrifice your money, your sleep, your time, your heart (beware: it gets stomped on!), your tears, for your kids.  And what do you get for it?!

So much more than you can imagine.  

You didn't know your heart could love so much.

That love for your child and the love they show back is worth every ounce of sacrifice you have ever given. 

Every night I go in to peek in on my children as they sleep.  And every night it is the same feeling: my heart catches somewhere up in my throat as I just adore my little angels.  *sigh*

Ha! Let's see how I feel in the morning!!

KC

the priority of time

It's been a few (busy) days since I've posted but it's not for lack of things to write about.  Each day my kids alone give me about 4 topics to write about!  God is constantly revealing things through them as long as I am willing to watch for those things.

No, the writing didn't happen mostly because of my order of priorities.  My biggest priority each day is to listen to what God has for me and to try to follow His prompting.  Just below that is my family: my husband, followed by my kids.  And the thing they need the most from me is time.  

When I write my to-do list (often mentally) for the day, it usually includes a variety of things that are done for my family: groceries, laundry, going to the bank, prepping meals, cleaning and straightening the house, etc.  But those things are the necessary, unseen ways that I take care of them.

This is not to say that they don't appreciate these things.  But these are not necessarily the things they yearn for the most.  No, my husband wants to sit and have a conversation with me or watch a TV show together with no interruptions.  My kids want me to read books with them or play a board game on the floor with them.  So with the short amount of time I have in my schedule with them, I try to make them my focus and the other stuff can wait until the next day. 

And sometimes I can get everyone in bed and come downstairs to write my blog.  But sometimes my need for sleep wins out. Because if I am exhausted the next day, I'm not very good for my family no matter how much caffeine I am trying to survive on!

So I guess I start writing my blog a bit earlier, maybe right after I have my iced tea!  That should be interesting...

KC

being

I've probably touched on this subject a time or two, but I'm gonna touch on it again.

Be you. 

Don't be who your mom thinks you should be (sorry, Mom).

Don't be who you think your friends want you to be.

Don't try to impress people by acting like something you're not.

Be You.

Be who God created you to be.

Who is that? Spend some time with Him.  He'll show you.

(Think this particular blog post was written just for you? Good! But it's also about me.  He's been poking and prodding and pushing and pulling me to stop "being" for everyone else and to "be" His.  And with this personality of mine, I'm bound to be anything but normal!)

KC

natural consequences

A friend of mine taught me this term a few years back when I was describing our daughter's personalities and some of the incidents we had experienced with her.  She has a tendency to learn things the hard way, wanting to see the results herself instead of heeding our warning.  Natural consequences.

Watching her suffer these consequences can sometimes be difficult for me.  You play too rough with the cat, she will scratch you.  You take out your frustration on a toy, it will break and I will not replace it.  You leave your little earrings all over the house, one is going to find its way into the vacuum.

But today I saw fruit. And having a stubborn and strong-willed child of God, I live for fruit!! 

This might seem insignificant to you, but for this mom it shows growth.  It gives me encouragement.

This afternoon after school she was wearing a brand new pair of shoes that her Aunt had delivered and was so excited to wear them!  She went outside to play with the neighborhood kids (and in our neighborhood the kids go full force into play, which is awesome but not so good for maintaining nice shoes) and I followed shortly to tell her to take them off.  But instead of telling her to, I laid out the pros and cons and let her make the decision.  

"If you wear these outside, they might get thrashed before you have even had a chance to wear them to  school.  I suggest you wear these other shoes instead and keep the new ones nice for school."

She was quiet for a moment while she weighed these two things in her mind: "wear them right now because I am so excited!!!! Or keep them looking sparkly and wonderful so I can be happy wearing them to school tomorrow.... "

30 seconds later, she was out the door wearing her old shoes, the new ones set aside for tomorrow. 

Hooray!!!  One small victory!  Enough of a victory to know that she is learning from natural consequences so that when she gets older and natural consequences are SO much bigger, maybe she'll avoid those too.  That's my prayer.

I still make dumb choices that lead to natural consequences: overload on the junk food over the holidays and you'll be up half the night feeling sick to your stomach!  You'd think after years of this, I'd figure it out.  Nope.  

Maybe I'm the one who needs prayer...

KC

that guy (again)

You know why I like my husband?

He makes me laugh.

He has the best laugh!

He works hard for our family.

He is always trying to be a better man.

He unloads the dishwasher (sometimes).

He is handy.

He is good at the things I stink at.

He desires God's will for our family.

He's hot stuff.

He brings me flowers, See's candy, and Strawberry Iced Teas just because.

You ever need to remind yourself of why you are married to that guy? (Or girl?). Write a list. Remind yourself. Take your focus off of their irritating habits and focus on their awesome and best qualities. Because it's easy to forget all the good when the ugly gets in the way...

KC

the up-side to optimism (see what I did there? clever.)

I found this quote on Pinterest a while back.  

I'm an optimist.  Sometimes too much of one.  I always look for the good in people, assuming the best of them and their character.  I suppose that could get me in trouble someday but again, I'm too optimistic to think that would happen.  

Some might think I am naive or perhaps dumb.  I don't have enough experience in this world.  Perhaps that is true, but I prefer to think that I walk in faith and that accounts for my optimism.

I have experienced sorrow.

I have had hardships.

I have cried countless tears.

I have fought secret battles.

I have walked uphill without shoes on. 

And I have survived.  How can I look back at all I have been through so far in my life, see how often God has carried me through (which is every time) and not be optimistic?  Goodness, He's taken care of me my whole life!  Why is He going to give up on me now?!

So yeah, I'm optimistic. I blame my faith.

KC

slow resolutions

Here we go, 2014!!  

I used to make resolutions. It was a great way to fail at something in the month of January.  (I think maybe I flossed my teeth for a an entire January, so I guess that counts as something!) We tend to think that we need to make big changes in our lives at the beginning of the year, but that's a lot of pressure to put on the whole year ahead. 

Here's what I started doing:

I look at my life regularly (not just once a year) to see what kinds of changes I want to make.  I set goals and come up with ideas of how to make it work.  And then I do it slowly.  I'm not great at making a huge change all at once.  (Except when we gave up soda.  That was all at once.  No more soda here.  Just healthier teeth.)  

Here's a couple (or a few) examples: 

We wanted to eat healthier so we stopped buying chips and cookies for the pantry and started buying more fresh fruits and veggies as well as more nuts and trail mix.  To change our entire diet overnight is SO overwhelming for me to tackle, but little steps have made huge changes for our family.

I had to give up coffee because I was killing my stomach with it.  Too much acid or something.  So I found a substitute with less caffeine but awesome flavor: strawberry iced tea.  I'll freely admit my addiction here, but I do feel better on a daily basis because of it.

I struggled to find a form of exercise that I liked so I was lucky to get 3 days of exercise a month!  But in 2012 I finally took the advice of numerous friends of mine: I signed up to run a half marathon.  Signing up made me accountable.  I had to train or I would be terrible on the day of the event.  My husband set up a training schedule for us and together we accomplished our first half marathon (He rocked it!! I finished it).  I will not say that I love running, but I am now "fond" of it.  (I did find a love of exercise in joining CrossFit, but I won't go into that because as you all know, those who CrossFit love to talk and talk and talk about it!!)

Laundry.  That used to be a bad word around here.  Mostly because sometimes I forget about the loads in the washer and sometimes also the loads in the dryer.  But also because it was never-ending.  So a few years back I decided to have A Laundry Day (being a stay-at-home mom helped accomplish this). I made one day (Monday) the day to get it all done.  Then I didn't worry about it for another week!  That felt awesome. Now because of my busy schedule my laundry day is usually 2 days long, but having 5 days off from laundry feels great to me. 

My "resolutions" list is still very long in my mind. Sometimes overwhelming.  But I pray for strength and self-discipline and determination on a daily basis, and I tell myself to tackle one thing at a time and eventually I will be able to look back at what I have done and be proud.

(And currently I'm on a roll flossing my teeth! And not just since this month started...) 

KC