tee ball and influence

My daughter plays tee ball. She's the only girl on the team. She tries her best, stands a head taller than all the boys, and runs a bit like a girl. She uses the coach's pink bat (with swirls) that he brings just for her. She loves playing first base because in tee ball, that's where all the action is.  She bats left handed (because that's what her Daddy taught her) and throws with her right.  She insists on wearing a ponytail because she can stick it through the back of her hat to keep it on when it's windy.  She tells me she's going to play tee ball until she's a grown-up.

You know why I think she likes tee ball so much? I think it's because she knows that baseball is her Daddy's favorite sport. He practices with her and works on her technique. He's patient with her and encourages her. Every once in a while she'll watch a couple innings of the Angels on TV with him (whenever we can get it) and cheers for his team because it's her favorite also.

This is such a good reminder to me of how we influence our children.  Our passions can very easily become their passions.

As I've reflected on this is the past, it's helped me try to pick wisely what I invest my time in.  My kiddos are watching me closely. Sometimes my sinful, selfish nature gets in the way and I have to try and shove it aside so I can set a good example for them. 

Above all else, my kids need to see God in my life. They need to see me reading the Bible. They need to hear me pray. They need to hear me offer Bible-based advice. They need to see me treat others as Christ would. They need to see me give to others, deny myself, exercise patience and self-discipline, and rely on God. They need to see my trying my best to exemplify Jesus in my life.

Looks like I've got a lot to work on.
KC

skyping: super fun!

I skyped today.  First time.  Pretty proud.  Pretty sure my niece (who only lives a couple miles away and skyped with me this evening) thinks I'm a big dork.  I'm okay with that.  Today, she helped open a whole new world to me!  I cannot WAIT to use this with dear friends who are far away.  I'm hoping my kids can have "Skype Pals" in the same way that I had a penpal!

Sometimes, I put off doing things that are unfamiliar to me.  Things that I have to try and figure out.  I usually ask myself later why I waited so long to figure these things out!  I waited forever to join MOMS Club (I have made some wonderful friendships because I finally joined at my sister-in-law's persistence).  I waited forever to figure out Pinterest (I can't even begin to tell you how much Pinterest has affected my life).  I waited forever to start meal-planning each week.  Life simplified by just taking about 15-20 minutes to plan out meals and make a shopping list each week.  Even making better meals - I was always afraid of making things like lasagna and meatloaf, things I figured would be automatic failures.  Nope!  Turned out great!  Exercise: okay, I'm still working on trying to make a habit of that one.  But I am trying and that's the first step.

So, to be quite honest, I have never read the entire Bible in a year.  I've tried starting in January and have failed... in January.  I put it on my "40 Before 40" list (a list of 40 things that I want to accomplish before I turn 40) with high hopes of completing it.  But if I never get started, I'll never finish.  And if I never get started, I'll never know what I'm missing.  Sometimes ignorance is bliss.  But in this situation, ignorance regarding the Word of God is just ignorance. 

So here goes!  Wish me luck.  Maybe you all can help keep me accountable.  (And maybe I'll try and find you on Skype too - it was SO much fun!) 

What new thing are you going to try today?

KC

blessed daily

This evening I was doing some reflecting and went to my husband to comment about how "lucky" we were.  Then I changed my wording to say how "fortunate" we were.  And then I realized, we are just plain blessed!  There is no luck, no fortune involved.  I need to work harder to get those words out of my vocabulary.  All good is from the Lord.  We are BLESSED!

It's quite easy to get caught up in what someone else has that we don't have.  Some people never seem to have to worry about money.  Others effortlessly maintain a beautiful house, car, children, and hair.  And still others seem to manage to avoid all trials and struggles that life often brings.  Not fair.  At least it feels that way.

And that's when it's time for me to take a step back.  My niece just got back from a mission trip to Guatemala.  My husband took a trip to Cambodia earlier in the year.  Trips like that open your eyes to conditions so much worse than the piddly little things we worry about here.  My children are healthy and happy (usually).  There is always food on the table.  We have 2 working vehicles.  Our air conditioning works.  We sleep in comfy beds.  We have automatic sprinklers.  There is no major disease happening in our family.  We have access to healthcare (not getting political here: compared to many, the fact that we have healthcare available to us should be considered a blessing).  Our water is clean.  We have family members that live nearby, that support us and that love us.  And so, so much more.

But most of all, my family has been saved.  By the grace of God, we have salvation.  Greatest gift ever.

Every once in a while, it's important to step back just to see how blessed we are.  No, not every once in a while.  I think it should be a daily thing.  Amidst the dissatisfaction that this world offers, we should daily be searching for our blessings. 

So what blessings have you acknowledged today?

KC

judging lately

Lately my envelope has been pushed. I've never considered myself a terribly judgmental person. Here and there, yes; but no more than anybody else... That was my thinking, anyway. Turns out that God decided to pull back my eyelids a bit to show me a few areas where I have been (mentally) pointing out people's specks.

[It's funny how you can hear something, believe something, and even preach that thing, and God can still show you where you are falling short in that area.  (Hence the subject of judgmentalism).]

I used to be irritated and upset about issues that were clearly against God's word. And perhaps rightly so - but I realized something I was missing: mercy. I could get all riled up, yell and scream, judge and convict, but that's never going to win anyone over to Christ. (Can you imagine Christ yelling at Zacchaeus about his cheating sins as a tax collector?  No, he went into the "sinner's" house to be his guest and Zacchaeus was saved.  Luke 19:10 - "For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost.")   Instead my heart should be aching, desiring for them to see the truth, and most of all: praying.

Funny thing about Christians: we're all hypocrites. It's been quite difficult to keep up the whole "perfect person" attitude  when compared to Jesus!  Every time my daughter laments about how awful she feels for some stinky behavior, I tell her how I still make bad choices all the time (children are such good reminders of just how imperfect we are).

I know Jesus came to heal those who were broken.  He hung out with those who were dirty, "below" everyone else. Those of little or no value to the rest of the world.  So who does that translate to in my life today? I could tell you, but that would reveal too much of my judgmentalism. So the question is, who does this translate to in your life?

A song hit me today that brought this whole thought process around into a full circle for me. It's called, "Jesus, Friend of Sinners" by Casting Crowns. I copied these lyrics from the internet so forgive me if there is some mistakes (and no punctuation!):

Jesus Friend of sinners we have strayed so far away
We cut down people in your name but the sword was never ours to
swing
Jesus friend of sinners the truth's become so hard to see
The world is on their way to You but they're tripping over me
Always looking around but never looking up I'm so double minded
A plank eyed saint with dirty hands and a heart divided

Oh Jesus friend of sinners
Open our eyes to the world at the end of our pointing fingers
Let our hearts be led by mercy
Help us reach with open hearts and open doors
Oh Jesus friend of sinners break our hearts for what breaks yours

Yeah,yeah,yeah

Jesus friend of sinners the one who's writing in the sand
Make the righteous turn away and the stones fall from their hands
Help us to remember we are all the least of thieves
Let the memory of Your mercy bring your people to their knees

Nobody knows what we're for only what we're against when we
judge the wounded
What if we put down our signs crossed over the lines and love like
You did
Oh Jesus friend of sinners

Open our eyes to the world at the end of our pointing fingers
Let our hearts be led by mercy
Help us reach with open hearts and open doors
Oh Jesus friend of sinners break our hearts for what breaks yours

You love every lost cause; you reach for the outcast
For the leper and the lame; they're the reason that You came
Lord I was that lost cause and I was the outcast
But you died for sinners just like me a grateful leper at Your feet

'Cause You are good, You are good And Your love endures forever
You are good, You are good and Your love endures forever
You are good, You are good and Your love endures forever
You are good, You are good and Your love endures forever
Oh Jesus friend of sinners
Open our eyes to the world at the end of our pointing fingers
Let our hearts be led by mercy
Help us reach with open hearts and open doors
Oh Jesus friend of sinners break our hearts for what breaks Yours

And I was the lost cause and I was the outcast
Yeah
You died for sinners just like me, a grateful leper at Your feet

(If you'd like to hear/see this song, you can find it here).

And to finish it off for me (well, not really because God NEVER stops teaching me new stuff, even when I think I know it all), I was looking for the story of Zacchaeus and the first page I came to in Luke was this: Luke 6: 37-43. "Do not judge, and  you will not be judged.  Do not condemn and you will not be condemned.  Forgive, and you will be forgiven.  Give, and it will be given to you.  A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap.  For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."  (And there's more - it goes on to talk about the afore-mentioned speck and the plank).

So where to go from here?  Living a life being non-judgmental seems nearly impossible! But I'll tell you what: if you don't judge me for not keeping my truck washed or for not getting my daughter's hair brushed in the morning, I won't judge you for wearing socks with your sandals or for still wearing sweatpants when you drop your kids off at school in the morning.

K

(And just a little p.s. - my intention in discussing judgment is not to imply that we should not make judgments for ourselves and our children according to the Word of God.  It is simply to state that we should be displaying mercy to the sinners around us, who, in all actuality, are just like the rest of us sinners.)

are you there, kc? it's me, God.

So apparently God is trying to tell me something, because He's bringing it up to me on a pretty regular basis. In devotions, on blogs, in books, conversation, and even on Pinterest!

Essentially the message is this: less criticizing, more encouragement. Specifically in regards to my kids.

When life gets frustrating, it's difficult to find a positive spin to put on situations. Is easy to point out how your children have failed when you are completely aggravated with them! It's much more difficult to swallow the criticism on the tip of your tongue and to find words of encouragement.

On my daily calendar (which has been on this page for 3 days) it says this: "Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones." Proverbs 16:24

In a book I am reading by Pam Farrel  and her husband, Bill,  entitled "The 10 Best Decisions Every Parent Can Make," I came across a paragraph that was the perfect example of our life right now. In it they talk about choosing to be consistent in parenting and discipline even when we are exhausted or frustrated or preoccupied or angry. For me that means keeping a level head in these situations. Sometimes I forget that being a good parent comes before anything else I deem important.

In a blog that I read regularly written by Jon Acuff, today's post was about how 1 negative comment + 1000 compliments = 1 negative comment. The criticism sticks.  It practically erases all positive words you might impart. I can think of examples of this in my own life!  In the comments of this particular blog, many parents mentioned how true this is when we are dealing with our own kids.  They hear the negative, not the positive.

A quote that was posted on Pinterest this week says this:
Oh give me patience
When wee hands
Tug at me with their
Small demands
And give me gentle
And smiling eyes.
Keep my lips from hasty replies
And let not weariness,
Confusion or noise
Obscure my vision of
Life's fleeting joys.
So when, in years to come
My house is still -
No bitter memories its
Rooms may fill.

Funny how God has been whispering these things to me for the past week - He felt no need to yell at me.  My, how I must try His patience, but He never gets exasperated!  And He's got a million other things to deal with (and by million, I mean a gabillion) and yet He lovingly takes the time to point me in the right direction.  

KC

amc's relay for life

I just wanted to promote one of my favorite events, coming up this weekend.  Ripon is hosting the American Cancer Society's Relay for Life.  This event is simply amazing.  Even if your life hasn't been touched in some way by cancer, you will find this weekend to be an emotional one.

The Relay begins on Saturday morning and will continue for 24 hours with people walking the track at the local high school the entire 24 hours.  The purpose for the continual walking around the track is to demonstrate that cancer never takes a break - and we will never stop trying to find a cure. 

During those 24 hours, various teams will be participating and will have mini fundraisers happening on the track.  There will be delicious meals available for purchase.  There will be entertainment on the stage.  There will be raffles and prizes to be won.  You will see men, women, and children wearing their purple shirts.  These are the amazing survivors of cancer. 

As I write about this event, many faces and names keep coming to mind of people who have been diagnosed with cancer just in the last year.  I heard somewhere that 1 in 4 people will be diagnosed with cancer.  Sometimes, when I am in a group of friends or family, I imagine the "what if".  What if it is one of us?  I look at my children and hope and pray that it will never be one of them. 

This year, I will not be able to participate because of a conflict in my schedule.  But as the day approaches, my heart aches to be there.  It has been a part of my life for nearly 7 years.  My children look forward to it every year.  We come home dusty and dirty and a bit tired from walking.  But it is worth it: we feel like we might just have accomplished a little something to help bring cancer to an end.

Five years ago, I had the privilege of being a Team Captain for the Relay while my Dad battled cancer (and when people say "battle," they truly mean that it is a battle to fight this war-waging disease).  Just about a month before the Relay took place that year, my Pa passed away.  To say that the Relay that year was emotional would be an understatement.  But that year, it became more to me than raising money to find a cure.

That year, it was about remembering and honoring those who had fought the fight.  It was about celebrating those who were walking survivors!  It was about cheering on those who were in the midst of their own battle.  (It is this way every year, but this particular year was when it became real to me.)

If you have a bit of time on Saturday (most of the events take place on Saturday, into the evening as well) and can stop by the Ripon High track, you won't regret it.  You might have to walk a little distance to get there, but it will be well worth it.

 And if you do, stop by and say "hi" to my wonderful gal pals who are walking on the MOMS Club team!  I did get to make some signs for the activities that they are doing.  So a little bit of me will be there.  Look for these signs:

 

If you'd like to see the schedule of events for those two days, click here and scroll down, way down.   Or to go to Ripon's main page, you can find it here.

KC

cherishing chubbiness

My almost 4 year old little boy still has chubby hands.  He says things like, "We found wots of widdle wolly-pollies at Gwandma's house today!"  He grabs my neck in really tight hugs.  He still holds my hand, actually reaches out to hold it because he still likes to.  He's still got a bit of a pot-belly.  I tell him often to stop growing up.  He tells me he has to grow up and talks about getting bigger, faster, stronger all the time.

Often times while out in public, older people (whose children have obviously grown up and left the house) tell me to cherish these years.  They grow up so fast. 

This used to really bug me - do they have any idea just how much work I go through (with my husband's help, of course, but this particular post is about me, not him...still got to give him credit, though) to raise these 2 kids?  Do they know how much sleep I have lost?  How much laundry I do now?  Do they understand the concept of cleaning the house while raising children?  It just doesn't happen because no matter what I have just cleaned up, one of my kids has come behind me 2 minutes later to MESS IT UP! 

Apparently, these kindly people have already lost brains cells.  They have forgotten the joys of trying to make your child eat dinner.  They certainly don't remember potty training.  Or switching your child from a crib to a bed that they can actually get out of... every 5 minutes... for an hour before they fall asleep.  They have forgotten the tantrums thrown in the grocery store that made you have to leave an entire cart full of groceries in aisle 4.  Or trying to get your child out of the habit of calling everything "poo-poo".  (I know - dirty language on such a clean blog!)  Cutting gum out of hair, fixing the crooked self-haircuts of your 4 year old and the cut she gave her 18 month old brother, removing every possibly breakable item from lower shelves, cleaning permanent marker off of table tops, putting the Tupperware back into the bottom drawer again and again and again, reminding your child to keep their skirt down, stepping on pointy little toys left in the middle of the floor: all things that these people have forgotten... maybe a result of post-traumatic stress disorder.

But I must get back to the statement a couple of paragraphs ago - this used to really bug me.  It hit me one day that maybe God was using these people as a reminder for me.  Being a parent is hard work.  It can be so frustrating.  It can bring out the worst in me.  Sometimes I honestly think I might go insane. Sometime I look back and wonder how I even made it through the day (obviously, it's always only by the grace of God). 

Setting aside the intentions of these folks who want me to "cherish" (although I do believe they are good intentions, I also think their memories are a bit selective), I believe they are little pokes from God to bring me back around to the good points of being a parent.  It is SO easy to get caught up in the negative, to let it ruin my day and my relationship with which ever child is currently pushing all my buttons at once.  But a comment from a well-meaning stranger always changes my perspective.  At least until the next child starts pushing buttons!

But in between the frustrations, I do look at my son's chubby little fingers and capture that picture in my memory.  I grab my daughter in tight hugs whenever I can because someday she probably won't want me to.  I hold the hand of my little boy every time he reaches for me and sometimes even when he doesn't.  I tickle my little girl as she squirms and kicks every which way.  I listen to the lisp of my boy when he tells me his little stories and a part of me wants that cuteness to stay forever.  When my girl sits and snuggles up to me on the couch just as I am about to get up, I remain for a bit because snuggling is the best.  And as we pray for dinner, I watch as my son grabs his Dad's hand and his sister's hand and she grabs for mine and I grab my husband's hand and I hope that we keep that habit up forever.  

KC