Ok, pretty much all my posts are opinion posts, but with this one, if you don't agree with it, you can just write it off in your head saying, "eh, that's just her opinion" and then maybe you won't feel the need to chew my head off because people are allowed to have their opinions and we are even allowed to have differing opinions...and maybe I don't want you to chew my head off! Let's just call it my opinion disclaimer.
Today I did something I don't think I've ever done: I took my kids, by myself, to the movie theater. We even got popcorn while we were there!
Now my kids have been to the movies with friends before, and my husband and I have taken them to the movies a couple of times. But we do not do this on a regular basis.
It's not because the movies are so expensive - today it was $5 each for the 3 of us. And it's not that there are never any good movies to watch with them. I happen to love Disney movies! And it's not that I can't handle two kids at the theater by myself because I am (usually) one very capable momma.
The main reason we don't go to the movies very often is the same reason why we don't go out to eat at nice restaurants with them: we want it to be a special treat.
Maybe my husband and I have taken a little bit of our own upbringing into how we are rearing our children, but that's mostly because we see the benefits it brought to our own lives. My parents rarely took us out to eat, anywhere! I didn't see a movie in a theater until I was in 8th grade, and it wasn't even my parents who took me. Disneyland? My junior year in high school on band tour. And that was probably also the first time I stayed in a hotel.
I don't feel deprived. I never did. But the times my parents took me to the Velvet Creamery were reserved for very special evenings. And I can tell you today what that first movie was because it was so memorable (Oliver and Company). And my trip to Disneyland was absolutely amazing!
So here's the opinion part: I think that kids are getting a lot of stuff and things these days. They are getting to go places and do a lot of things. Maybe there's nothing wrong with that, but for my kids, I want them to see these things, these adventures, these memories as privileges. Not something to expect or as something that becomes commonplace to them because they do it all the time. I don't want to lose the "specialness" of creating these memories.
And you know what? To me, that's not preparing my kids for real life. As an adult, real life is hard work. Going to work everyday can be a pain. Money does not grow on trees. Trips to Disneyland don't land in your lap; they usually require a lot of financial planning and work to pay for it. Responsibilities often get in the way of fun. Things will not be handed over to you without a bit of effort on your part. Some days are going to be boring and there's not always going to be someone there to entertain you. That's life. That's "adulting."
Maybe you think that makes me a mean parent.
I'm totally fine with you keeping your opinion to yourself. 😬 (My oldest gives me her opinion of me all the time and that's enough for me!)
But let me bring to light just one more thing, one that I'm not always good at teaching my children, but I'm trying because I know there is value in this one: maybe, just maybe, my children need to learn to heed the call of God on their hearts to give more and live with less. There is so much value in learning to sacrifice yourself by giving to others. Not only giving financially, but of their time and their talents. And the rewards of doing that are unmatched by going to the movies or to a fancy restaurant.
I'm sorry if I stepped on any toes, but I did start off with my "opinion disclaimer." Not that it's legally binding or anything, but I'd like to stay friends. 😊
KC
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