changing the world

I find that I tend to repeat certain themes on my blog. It's not so much that I think y'all need to hear it, but more so that I need constant reminding on things. You'd think that I'd figure something out and it would stick, right? But no, I'm like a child: in need of constant training over and over and over again.

Today's reminder: Encourage.

In each of my kids' rooms there lives a notebook. Neither one is very fancy and they were both inexpensive. But what's inside is invaluable.

Every so often, right before I go to bed, I write a message to each kiddo, something that will encourage them when they wake up and read it the next day. Sometimes I also apologize for something I did earlier in the day (because I can do some pretty stupid stuff and say some real idiotic things as a mom) or I remind them of a behavior they are trying to change. But it's always something to build them up and encourage them for the next day. When I'm done, I leave it open on their bedroom floor where they will trip over it in the morning. It ensures they will read it. (Sometimes there's too much other junk and stuff to trip over on their floor so I will leave it right outside their bedroom door!)

My kids ask for me to write in their notebooks frequently. And I totally understand why. If I woke up each morning to an encouraging message awaiting me, I'd probably have an easier time getting out of bed! And then I would feel just awesome about myself and then I would do amazing things throughout the day and make the world a better place, I'm sure of it!

But like I mentioned before, sometimes as a mom I do stupid stuff like: not write words of encouragement in their notebooks on a regular basis. Soooo, I'm going to go do that now.


Do you have 30 seconds to send/write/say something encouraging to someone? You never know: your words could help someone change the world!

KC

summer plans

Ummm, did anyone else see the beginning or middle of summer? Because I'm pretty sure I missed it. IT IS ALREADY JULY 18!! I can sit here and be flabbergasted at how quickly the time has flown, but I'm really, truly, not at all flabbergasted. *sigh* It was so crazy busy at the Cragin Homestead that I think we're all just starting to emerge from our own version of "survival mode." I, personally, am crawling out, hiding my eyes from the blinding light that pours through my kitchen windows because I haven't yet bought curtains for them...

Let me sum up June and the first half of July for you:


Kitchen Remodel
House guests
Wedding (semi-coordinator of said wedding)
House guests
Finish of Kitchen Remodel
July 4th Celebration
Anniversary
Linc's Birthday
House guests
 And BOOM!: we start school in 1 month.

I had some awesome plans set out for myself so that I could accomplish amazing things this summer. I was going to take time to write every day. I was going to make sure my kids got some awesome fun (educational) stuff done every week! I have a small mountain of upcycling projects that I just can't wait to delve into. They beckon me every day! I had plans written out in my bullet journal (which is a new current obsession, thanks to an introduction from my niece!) and I was going to accomplish ALL the things! EVERY SINGLE THING!

And here I sit, just now blogging for the first time in 2 months. And I cleaned up a piece of furniture today, the first piece I've touched. And I had my son read to me today. AND DID I MENTION THAT IT IS ALREADY JULY 18?!

Today's take away in all this malarkey? (Did you know that it was spelled "malarkey" and not "malarky?" I didn't.)
Here's the truth: We make our plans, but God directs them.

When I look back at this past month and see how He worked in our lives as well as the lives of the people we interacted with through our kitchen remodel and the numerous house guests we had, He knew, better than we did, what He was doing.

When I look back at the experiences and growth that has happened to our family over the last month, I wouldn't change God's plans back to my own for a million bucks. I mean, I'd consider it because a million bucks is a WHOLE lot more than I make teaching piano lessons each year and it would remodel the ENTIRE house, not just the kitchen....but I'd really only consider it for a minute...or five.

God makes it pretty clear in His #truthbomb from Isaiah 55: 9 ~  "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts."

That's right: God just put us ALL in our place!

So go ahead make your plans, but just know that His are bigger and better and higher!

KC

oh monday...

People.

I am lying on my family room floor, eating Cheetos at 10:49 at night while I write this. THAT is the kind of Monday it has been: Cheetos at 10:49 on Monday night bad. The entire world was out to get me today, I'm 100% certain of that. And the thing that sucked most of all was that I woke up with a "determined to get it all done" attitude, ready to take on all the challenges and accomplish things left and right! And little by little, Monday tried to beat it out of me. Praise Jesus for amazing friends who text you encouragement before noon because the day has already made its way down the toilet by then!

Perhaps you noticed one key little word in the above paragraph (or maybe not. If you're like me you're reading this as you're waking up and things are still a big foggy.) The word is "tried." Yeah, that's right: tried! Monday did NOT take me down. It didn't finish me. I didn't give up but kept on keeping on (or whatever that phrase is...) You see, me and Mondays, we've been battling all school year long. I honestly have no idea why it is the way, but everything is an uphill battle on Monday; just a real struggle of a day! And today is our last Monday of the school year so I just think Monday decided to give me one last hurrah. 

But you know what, Monday?! I'm getting used to your crap and I'm a fighter! NO SURRENDERING TODAY!!

Now granted, I didn't handle all of today's garbage with patience and grace. Just ask my kids!! Any complaining was handle with absolute frustration and irritation 😳 and I'm pretty sure I just gave up on teaching my daughter Math today. And when I discovered that there was no ground coffee left for me to make a "Saving Grace Cup of Joe," I ran our booties to Sbux and got an expensive fattening, sugar-filled Salted (not really because the salt is seasonal *sigh*) Caramel Mocha Frappe. And when finding something for lunch became a hassle for everyone, I completely gave up and headed to McD's for all the unhealthy lunch choices. 

However!!!! We accomplished a TON of stuff that I could've just said "FORGET YOU, STUFF! I AM NOT IN THE MOOD!" That's right! We did school work. We purged half of the school room. We cleaned and did laundry and dishes and ran 25 errands...well it felt like 25, ok?! We had a healthy dinner and created and crafted together. And when the stupid stuff happened, like the low fuel light on my truck that came on in the middle of errands (ok, God, I'd be super grateful if you'd make the gas gauge in my truck just like the little old lady's bottle of oil: not overflowing, but just enough that I'd never run out...) I just added another errand to my "to do" list and "to did" it. 

I kicked Monday's butt and I deserve every single one of these Cheetos. I'm even gonna give myself props because these are the healthier Cheetos: no artificial preservatives, flavors, or colors! (Okay, that really only makes me feel a smidge better about my late night chip snacking.)

Friends: don't let your Monday (whatever that might be in your life) drag you down. Fight through it! Show 'em who's boss! And it's okay to keep it all balanced with some grace for yourself, ya know: like eating Cheetos at 10:49 at night. 😉

Tomorrow is a new day. ❤️

KC

by the grace of God

A while back I had a wonderful gal leave me a voicemail about my blog. She blessed me with her words of encouragement and praised me for the job I was doing as a woman of God. She told me that as she read my blogs, she believed that I was more than surviving, I was thriving by the grace of God.

She's right, in one sense. I would be drowning in this whole wife/mom/woman thing if it weren't for God. But here I am, walking upright, striving to be who God wants me to be. I get laundry done and feed the people in this house who always seem to need to eat. I maintain a clean-ish house 😜 and my kids are decent at their math facts and reading skills. I've got amazing friends. And we live in the most wonderful neighborhood. And my truck still runs and most of my clothes don't have holes in them. So I get from one perspective, I'm thriving!

But that's not how it feels. Maybe it's just me, but usually I feel like I'm floundering. I could be doing everything a whole lot better than I do. I could be disappointing a lot less people. I could be a better wife and mom who knows how to get every stain out of all articles of clothing and who can cook healthy things and make them taste amazing so my while family will love every meal. I could be better at responding to emails and texts and messages. I could take more time to send out birthday cards and to make more phone calls to friends. I could be making better choices on how to spend our money or on how to educate our kids. I could...I should...😕

Mental picture time:

I am not sitting in a beautiful sail boat with a giant smile on my face and the wind blowing through my hair as the sun shines down on my skin.

Nope. I'm in a life preserver, bobbing along with the waves, exhausted and wet with sunburned cheeks and dried out lips. 

I'm surviving. 

But let me tell you what surviving means to me. 

A survivor is someone who has made it through difficult times and has come out stronger on the other side. A survivor is someone who lives in gratitude because of what they have been through. A survivor doesn't give up. A survivor can face the next trial with determination and confidence because they can look back and see what they already lived through. 

Yes, because of God, I am alive and thriving.

But because of God, I am also a survivor.

I know I'm in good company when I say I'm surviving by the grace of God.

Can I get a Hallelujah?!

KC

sucky parenting

Ok, people, I seriously suck. 

I am the worst mom ever.

Once again I had to apologize to my daughter for saying something hurtful to her.

I didn't yell at her (yay, me!)

I just wasn't very thoughtful in my comment to her and watched her expression sink as we walked up to church. YES!! AS WE WALKED UP TO CHURCH!! For reals: I hurt my kid's feelings on the way to church. Not even at home before church or in the car on the way to church. No. Literally 10 yards from the front door of church, I stomped on my kid's feelings. I told you: worst mom ever!

I stood through worship just contemplating how to resolve this. I had a long time to contemplate because our worship lasts a while and we stand the whole time. I need to stop wearing high heels to church...

As soon as we sat down and our pastor came to the front of the stage, I grabbed a pencil and wrote an apology to my daughter. Who, in turn, grabbed the pencil from me and wrote an apology back to me!! 

WHAT?!?! 

Ok. In reality, it's not that amazing that my kiddo apologized to me. Let me explain why this seemingly rare phenomenon happens pretty regularly in our house.

Turns out that I suck at parenting, which I have already illustrated at the beginning of this post. I am constantly saying and doing stuff that is well below the standard of parenting that I set for myself before I had kids. Which was ridiculous when I set it, but still: I'm not perfect. I do dumb things. I make mistakes. I swallow my pride. And then I apologize.

I apologize. A lot. I am setting a good and frequent example of what apologizing should look like. Because I have to do it often. 

You know what they say about teaching your children: they learn from your actions much more than from you telling them what to do. "Actions speak louder than words." Model the behavior that you want your children to follow. Well I am modeling the whole apologizing thing like a CHAMP!! 

So the bonus of being an imperfect and sucky parent is that my children are getting a front row seat in how to apologize. 

I guess I'll take it. 

KC

no more rain, please

My Momma reminded me last night: When it rains, it pours!

Well I, for one, am freaking tired of the rain, both literal and figurative!! 

Usually, when it's pouring rain here at our house, it's because the devil is trying to "rain on our parade." (See what I did there?!) It's as though he sees the good that is trying to be accomplished and he is setting up blockades left and right. Let me tell you, it's exHAUSTing!

For the past couple of months, I've been trying to figure out what God is trying to tell me. Now I'm not so convinced that it's God but rather the devil trying to get in the way of some major stuff that God's got coming down the way.

There have been days over the past couple of months when I have wanted to just give up on some passions that God has put on my heart. It'd be easier that way. But I keep plugging away, even in small pieces, knowing that there's a purpose for it all.

And now that I realize that the devil is standing in the way, I'm just going to work harder.

Did you hear that, Satan? I'M JUST GONNA WORK HARDER!! SO THERE!!

I looked at my weather app for this week and I see no rain in the forecast. As a matter of fact, tomorrow it should be sunny all. day. long. And, I don't know about you, but I am in desperate need of some sunshine! ☀️

But, just in case it rains, I've got an adorable pair of polka dotted rain boots and a pink umbrella from my friend and a great, big God to back me up so I am prepared. 

Did you hear that too, Satan?! I AM PREPARED!!

Going to bed now. 

Tomorrow's gonna be a bright, sunshiny day. 💛

KC

groovin' old guy

We went to church this morning and we sat near the back. Our kids like to sit with us in church instead of going to the children's program which means we sit near the back just in case they get too wiggly or drop a container full of Legos during the service and distract everyone around us. #truestory #completelyembarassedmom #Legosdonotcometochurchanymore 

This morning we sat behind an elderly couple, probably in their late 80's. (We stand for much of the first part of the service because we start out by worshiping together. The music we sing is "loud worship" or at least that's what I call it. There's probably a minimum of 8 people on stage at one time leading or ship. They provide ear plugs as you walk in! So yes, loud.) As we were singing, I kept getting distracted by the elderly gentleman because he was groovin'! He was beebopping back and forth and completely enjoying his time of worship. At one point my husband caught my eye and with a big grin he nodded to the gentleman who was just so stinkin adorable in his worship!!

And it got me thinking: church should be a joy! (I know; seems like common sense but let me tell you, people, this has been a STRUG-GLE for me.)

I don't know about you, but when I think of God designing a worship service at His church, I think the entire event would be a joyous one!! Hearts would be overflowing with gratitude and people would be happy to be there, right?

One of the things I find so impressive about our church is how our pastor can reach so many people at different levels of faith simply by speaking truth. He is not judgmental, but he also doesn't shy away from Biblical truths. He talks about hard issues but it's  not saturated with condemnation. It is a joy to be in church, listening to our pastor challenge us and hearing truth that we need to hear! I don't walk out of there feeling like a horrible person, but I am more aware each time I leave church of things I need to work on or change. 

It's easy to criticize a church that is "entertaining" or whose worship set has lights and a smoke machine. I used to call our church a "seeker friendly" church whose goal was to reach those who don't go to church regularly. They played up to those outside the church, trying to attract them. I didn't think that was necessarily a bad thing, but it just wasn't necessary for us "Hardcore Christians!" 😜

But the longer I'm there, the more I realize that it is just as much for me as it is for someone who has never been to church. My family, all 4 of us, walk into church with expectant hearts, happy to be there, ready to participate, to listen and learn, to enjoy our time with God! It has taken a long time for us to get there.

Anybody else wanna come with me to church? We'll save you seats!

We'll be the family sitting behind the grooving old guy!

KC