When our big twerps were just little kiddos, learning how to talk and walk and be naughty, we were parents in "training mode." We would encouraged our little ones to crawl and to make cooing noises. We would help them stand up over and over again. We would say, "No-no!" 50 times in a row as they would reach for the remote control or the cat's tail, or crawl towards the water dish. I remember when the realization hit that toddlers are not smart people when it comes to learning how to do something correctly the first time...
Oh man, little did I know! (SMH, which stands for Shaking My Head, but I think if you just make the sound "smh," it pretty much gives the same connotation!)
Now my kids are older and the training process is as frustrating as ever! When I first became a parent, I had NO CLUE that children had to be taught the same lesson 354 times before it stuck! Like manners, for example. I can finally beam with pride now when my kids say "please" and "thank you" without any prompting. And I do beam. Shucks, I put in YEARS of training to get them to remember to say that on their own!
We still haven't conquered how to hang wet clothing on the 12 hooks in the bathroom after getting out of the pool or spa. I guess it is a tough stretch to get the bathing suits and towels from the floor AAAAALLLLL the way up onto the hook. And while we have mastered getting the dishes into the dishwasher (4 out of 5 times - I call that "mastered" in my parenting book), we still haven't figured how to play Tetris with the dishes as we load them. I've already discovered my parenting fail when it comes to getting the toothpaste on the toothbrush. Apparently the mirror, sink, faucet, and wall become appropriate places for the paste when I no longer supervise the brushing of the teeth.
When bedtime hits, we still have to tell our kids: "Pets, pjs, and teeth, please!" as if for the last 7 or so odd years we haven't been saying that. As if we might just decide one night to skip one of those. The socks are in the middle of the floor. The cheese stick wrapper (the utter bane of my existence) also ends up in the middle of the floor. And the littlest Lego pieces...I can't even go there right now.
Now, lest you think that I let these things go buy without some kind of discipline (because, afterall, I am trying to teach my children to BE disciplined), there are a number of "training tactics" I employ on a regular basis. If I see and incomplete task, I track the culprit down and make them take care of it. I have been known to yell at my kid who is outside playing with the neighbors to come in the house to do something as simple as pick up the stinking cheese stick wrapper from the middle of the floor. I have also started charging my kids for leaving electronics on the floor. I pick them up and put them in a basket and charge them rent to get it back. We've made them do pushups and jumping jacks and have taken away privileges. We make them do chores for us in addition to their own if they fail to do what we asked of them. Nothing wrong with doubling up on their responsibilities to teach them...well...responsibility.
And yet. And yet, people. Here we are, 12 years into parenting, still training. Does it ever end?!
And then last night it hit me: it doesn't. It doesn't end. Ever. You know why? Because I reflected back on myself and all the things that God is working on in me. I see how many times I have tried and started and then made absolutely no progress. I am constantly being reminded by God of the things He is trying to teach me. Over and over and over again. (SMH again).
I think that God must experience that same frustration (if He deals with frustration...does God get frustrated??) when we as adults cannot get our stuff together. We try to get it right but then quickly go back to old habits... Poor God: As a parent, I understand a smidge of what He feels.
Yet, He still loves me. He's still patient with me. He gently reminds and directs me. And is patient with me. He doesn't yell or stomp his feet. He doesn't criticize. He shows me grace. He helps and is patient with me. Did I mention that He is patient? Because He has to be when He's dealing with me!!
I guess I know what that means: I need to practice my training techniques. I'm not necessarily a yeller...all of the time, but I definitely express my frustration, often. And the patience is definitely lacking. And grace, well, if I'm going to be an example of Jesus in my kids' lives, I suppose I should be showing grace a bit more. I guess you could say I'm a parent in training. Ha!! (Unfortunately, that doesn't make me feel very confident in myself...) (SMH)
KC
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