capable

Today my kids and were up in our den doing something...I can't remember what because it's my Christmas vacation and I turned my brain off some days ago. I noticed that a cushion on a foot rest had a slight rip in the seam and I grabbed a needle and thread to start a quick repair. As I was threading the needle I started chatting with them about how I was going to teach them how to sew someday. And how I was going to teach them to do a lot of things while I had the chance.

Jayne said that'd be fine as long as they were things she felt like learning to do. (This is my battle, folks.) I then delved a little deeper, hoping that maybe 50-75% of what I said might stick. That's a decent percentage right there!

Here's the deeper:

As the mother of these two kiddos, I feel it is my responsibility to make them capable people. I want them to know how to do a whole myriad of things. I want them to experience a large variety of activities in their lives. Sewing, crafting, creating, laundry, cooking, baking, music, sports, cleaning, taking care of pets, ordering their own food, paying at the register, painting, relating to others with differences, building, learning a second language, photography, teaching each other, exercising, making healthy food choices, science experiments, understanding technology (better than me), traveling, finances, giving, taking care of little ones...this list could go on and on for all that I want to teach amd have my kids experience! I'd better get crackin'. 

By creating multi-faceted lives for my children, I'm hoping they will be able to do three valuable things:

1. Fend for themselves and take care of their own well-being.

2. Be able to relate to and help others.

3. Most important: be better equipped for God's calling in their lives.

Unfortunately, I know I'm not going to be able to teach them everything, and the things I do teach will be far from perfectly taught. (Turns out that I'm not perfect at everything...or at anything!) But that's okay because I realized years ago that a God's grace covers what I miss. He is perfect at everything. I'm glad He's got my back in this whole parenting thing I got myself into!

KC

without regrets

Today I was chatting on the phone with a dear friend of mine. We were discussing hurts from the past and how much it stinks to work through them and how they can continue to affect life in the present. I was reminded of a conversation that I had with my husband years ago. I didn't realize it at the time, but it profoundly impacted my perspective on life.

We dated in our late college years so much of our teens has passed by that point. I remember asking him if he ever regretted anything he had done in his past. Without hesitation he said, "No."  I was a bit shocked because I knew there were things I had done and said that I wish I hadn't. But then he explained further. 

You see, all the choices he had made in the past, good or bad, had shaped him into the man he was. You learn from bad decisions just as much as (or maybe even more than) from your good decisions. (Wise man!)

We all do dumb things. And we all say stupid things! I know I'm not the only one who has asked a non-pregnant lady how far along she was! But I will never, ever ask that question again, even if she looks like she's going to pop! 

But it's what we do after our choices that make a difference in our future. Even people who have made horrible decisions have turned around to become advocates against their terrible choices. 

I don't want to live a life of regrets.

And I'm not convinced that God is a God of condemnation. 

John 12:47b - "for I did not come into the world to judge the world, but to save it."

(Now, lest you think that I believe God is okay with anything that makes me happy, let me just explain that there is a difference between "condemnation" and "conviction." There has been pleeeeeeentyyyyyyy of "conviction" in my life from my all-loving God who desires the good results that comes from good decisions, let me just tell you! But I have had to learn that the "condemnation" I felt was not from God, but from people. But that is a whole different topic for a whole other day.)

I try not to wallow in my past. I try to learn from it and use it shape my future.

So if you are pregnant, please forgive me for not asking how far along you are...

KC

heavenly peace

This evening as I sit under a blanket on my couch thinking about this Christmas celebration, all I keep thinking is: Phew! I can see my carpet!

In other words, it didn't get so chaotically crazy In here that we couldn't clean it up (well almost, because the Lego piles need to stay where they are according to what is being created out of them) and manage to bring back some sanity in the house. 

You know what's on the schedule for tomorrow? A whole lotta nothing. There is no place I have to be. No thing that must get done. Peace. (Well, that's with high hopes that the kids get along tomorrow because they are so distracted by their new treasures that they forget to fight with each other.)

...and now the last words of Silent Night float through my head: sleep in heavenly peeeeeeace, sleep in heavenly peace. 

I hope you get a little peace after this Christmas hustle and bustle.

Peace to sit and read.

Peace to take a nap.

Peace to enjoy a hot cup of coffee.

To enjoy your family.

To reflect on your blessings.

To chat with a loved one.

Peace that comes in knowing the Babe has been born; the Babe that will save us from this unrestful and unpeaceful earth. 

Heavenly peace. 

Merry and Peaceful Day After Christmas to you all,

KC

a big gift in a small package

This evening I wrapped the last gift. It is probably the smallest gift under the tree. It's not fancy; I didn't even put a bow on it. But it was the most important gift that I put under the tree. This gift marks the beginning of a new tradition for the Cragin Family.

Tomorrow morning our kids will wake up early - some natural alarm clock that wakes them up before the sun on Christmas Day. They have specific instructions not to wake us before 7:00. We'll have a quick breakfast because patience is at a minimum and one by one we will open our gifts. I'll save that little one for the very end.

You might think us to be cruel parents, but we have never promoted the idea of Santa in our home. This was a personal decision that we made before we ever had children. Our kids like the idea of Santa, think he's a wonderful character, and have very specific instructions to never tell any child that Santa isn't real. Our focus for Christmas has always been the birth of a Savior.

This evening within that little box I wrapped up baby Jesus from my favorite nativity set. In the morning  the kids are going to get some great gifts - I cannot wait to see their expressions! But I'm hoping that opening that last gift will serve as a reminder of the true meaning of Christmas, the best gift of all: The birth of Jesus Christ.

Merry Christmas to you all,

KC

Christmas in heaven

I miss him. I know I'm not the only one. Everybody who met him, loved my dad.

Christmas makes loss fresh, whether you lost someone you care about just this year and you have to try and celebrate without him or her for the first time, or if it's been many years and you think of how much more enjoyable it would be with him or her there. Christmas is bittersweet: a time to celebrate while you are desperately missing a loved one.

You ever wonder if there is a Christmas celebration in heaven? A happy birthday party for the One who made it possible for all of those souls to be in heaven? Could you imagine?! Best party ever! I betcha the food is amazing and the cookies aren't fattening. The music is phenomenal because: angel choirs!! And the company - all people you get along with! 

Ok, maybe there isn't a Christmas celebration. But I'm thinking every day is probably a celebration in heaven. And that is the only thing that makes it okay for my Dad to not be here for Christmas. He is somewhere a million times better than earth. He is experiencing the deepest of joys, the most incredible peace, and unfathomable love, all in the presence of his Savior. 

I'd love to celebrate the holidays with my Pa, but I'd never wish him out of heaven to do so. 

I don't have great words of comfort. Loss sucks. It'll always hurt. The holidays will be difficult. 

But I know someday I'll have a great reunion with my Pa in heaven and then we will celebrate together and make up for all the times we missed for so many years. That gives me hope, and a little peace, and something incredible to look forward to. 

The "now" sucks.

But the future's gonna be awesome. 

I can't wait to celebrate Christmas in heaven.

KC

JOY

It's been one crazy busy month. December hit and suddenly my to-do list quadrupled in length and time sped up at the same time - what's that all about?! So this week we finish school and I have no piano students so you'd think there'd be some time of rest...

HAHAHAHA! 

Nope.

Family sickness, child crabbiness, last minute gift shopping, Drs. appointments and BOOM: another day that was gone in just minutes. 

With the busy and quickly passing days, it's been difficult to maintain the holiday spirit. I light the Christmas candles, turn on the Christmas lights, listen to Christmas music, and eat the Christmas cookies, but I can't slow down the days that lead up to the big day. It's exhausting.

But you know what isn't lost? What can't be taken away? 

Joy!

Despite the busyness, the gift buying, the food preparation, the Christmas programs and parties, and whatever else may happen before the big day, it is all leading up to the most joyous celebration of all: the birth of a Savior!

People, I am a sinful, rotten creature. I do not deserve the gift of heaven. But I still get to go there because my Savior, celebrated on Christmas Day, took all that rotten, sinfulness upon himself and took the punishment for every bit of it so that I could be deemed worthy for heaven. JOY!!

That joy is ever-present, even when life gets out-of-control busy and exhausting. It lives in the depths of my soul and that joy fuels me. It is constant.

Joy to the world, the Lord has come! 

Yes! That is true Joy.

KC 

Easter - the best gift of Christmas (guest post by JB)

I was thinking that I should focus on Christmas this week because, well, Christmas! And lo and behold, a buddy of mine, whom I have been pestering to write for me as a guest blogger, sent me a great perspective on Christmas. Read this and then mentally applaud JB for sharing the true meaning, the deeper meaning of Christmas so clearly:  

So so close to Christmas, we celebrate the birth of Jesus. We celebrate by giving gifts, spending time with family and friends, let's not forget the FOOD!! 

For some of us, we look forward to the anticipation of what Christmas brings. For some it's much needed time off, others figuring out what needs to be done to stay away from the tax man. It's also stressful to some making sure every nephew or niece gets a gift or stocking stuffer, that every ingredient is on hand for the FOOD! (See my love for food) 

But tonight, at the Sounds of the Season concert at my church, Modesto CRC, (which if you missed.....make sure it's on your list of things to see next year. Amazing job by so many members of my church), I focused on Jesus's impending death. 

Why??? As I held that candle at the service and sang "Silent Night" I was overwhelmed with what it means that Jesus died on a cross for ME! I wanted it to be Easter. I realize that had Jesus never been born, we could never celebrate his death and resurrection. 

Maybe it's because I've been so busy at the farm, (it's hard being Farmer John) I've not been able to feel the joy of what Christmas brings. But what I've seen and heard while selling Christmas trees this year has made me see the despair that is so prevalent in some people. Worse yet, it's brought out bad stuff within me. I've been judgmental, irritable to others including my own family and wife that I love. So much temptation as well. We all know the usual temptations.  

But with Easter there is always a sense of renewal. We focus on all the bad things we do and think and ask forgiveness, whereas Christmas is celebrating Jesus birth. But think about the selfishness that happens. 

Maybe tonight was just what I needed to find the joy in Christmas. I am renewed, Jesus Christ is born!!! Alleluia!! 

JB

Show my buddy some appreciation for his reminder of how awesome Christmas is because it points to Easter. Thanks, JB, for sharing your words!