hard work

I can't tear myself away from watching the Olympics - it's on our TV all day long. 

Maybe it's because everyday I see amazing accomplishments acquired by months and years of hard work. And that is HUGE motivation for me. Seeing others succeed makes me want to work harder!

Maybe it's because I see some of the athletes who have come from tough backgrounds and instead of letting their life's situations drag them down and give them excuse, they used their difficulties as reasons to succeed. 

Maybe it's all these hard-working, in shape athletes who inspire me to get out there and keep exercising!

Maybe it's the good sportsmanship that is a good reminder to be a good loser as well as a gracious winner.

Maybe I'm tired of all the other garbage that's on TV that my kids watch: whiny, spoiled, entitled kids and teens getting their way and getting everything they want.

Maybe the Olympics should be on TV more often so that my kids can get excited about accomplishments and be motivated by successful men and woman who WORKED HARD to get where they are in the Olympics! 

I know the Olympics aren't near done, but I'll miss the games when it's all over.

KC

#justsaynotoentitledkids #yayforsuccessfromhardwork 

getting

Perhaps one of the most crucial books for my marriage was one that was given to me shortly after Scott and I were married. We both read it and it has played a huge part in my perspective towards marriage and is also the reason for much of the success in our relationship. 

His Needs, Her Needs by Willard F. Harley, Jr. 

I loaned that book out so many times that I no longer know where it is. And it has been years since I read it so I don't remember all the details (time to re-buy it!) but one important piece of advice that has been re-iterated over and over by those who are in successful relationships is this:

Marriage is not about what you get. 

Marriage is about what you give.

Maybe this doesn't work for you or for your relationship. But for me, it defines what I am doing in my relationship. I am striving to figure out what makes my husband tick and to meet those needs. 

I'm not perfect at this whole "giving of myself" thing. My husband can attest to that. My selfishness likes to get in the way...frequently. I can easily slip into the mindset of, "Why didn't he do this for me?" or "How could he have forgotten about that?" or "Why doesn't he think the same way I do?" and his favorite: "Why can't he read my mind?!"

And that's where I need to stop myself or the bitterness will build up and I will become so self-focused that I become useless to the relationship, not giving of myself whatsoever. 

I know this isn't a popular view these days: "giving" as opposed to "getting," but I've seen the success it has brought to our relationship when both of us employ the same mindset, even when we don't feel like it. (It is very difficult to make a tasty dinner when you are mad at your husband. And to wash his clothes when you know it would feel better to throw them away!) 

Plus, it's Biblical. And I'm a huge fan of all things Biblical because that God who inspired the Bible is a gazillion times wiser than me.

See?

KC

today's outfit

I came across this verse today: "Clothe yourself with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience." Colossians 3:12

What I didn't come across today was a verse that said: "Clothe yourself with judgment, selfishness,  pride, harshness, and impatience." 

You know why? 

Because that's not what God wants us to clothe ourselves in. 

Here's today's outfit:

Compassion: sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others

Kindness: the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate

Humility: a modest or low view of one's own importance; humbleness

Gentleness: considerate or kindly in disposition; amiable and tender; mild and soft

Patience: capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset

Hmmm, I might need to change up the outfit I was planning on wearing today. 

How about you?

KC

happiest of birthdays

Today is my birthday. And between all of the texts, phone calls, messages, and Facebook notifications, I was thought of by over 100 people today. 

I know there are some people who don't like the whole Facebook birthday reminder thingy. I personally don't use it because I know that I'll remember to write for one friend and then forget for another friend and then just feel horrible. It's one of my 745,980 shortcomings (I might be underestimating there.) 

I, however, want to leave this birthday telling you all how rad it felt to be thought of by each one of you! Instead of seeing the political rantings and the spewing of not nice words, I got to read through birthday greetings from my friends. 

Imagine if we took this birthday wishing to a whole nother level (I know it's not a word, but I'm making it one for tonight because it's my birthday and also because it is my poetic license.) What if we were more intentional about sending little greetings to each other just because?! What if we looked for ways to make others feel great about their day...just because?! What if, when we thought of someone, we actual let them know: "Hey, just wanted to let you know I was thinking of ya!" What if we encouraged, uplifted, and complimented.........just because?! 

I don't know about you, but if I had that much positivity pouring into my life on a regular basis, I'm pretty sure I'd be floating on a cloud most days (Yeah, that's my analogy. I happen to thrive on good words.)

I know, I know, I go back to this whole "say nice words" thing frequently on my blog. But that's because I believe so strongly that our words, been from a very young age, can make or break a person. 

 

And I think we should be "making" more people and "breaking" less. 

KC

in a tent

I'm camping. 

In 100 degree temps. 

In a tent. 

In the dirt.

With my two kids.

Without my husband.

And the bathroom feels like it is 5 miles away.

And I am trying to enjoy every minute of it.

Except the dirt.

And the heat.

And missing my guy.

It's not really all that bad. 

My family is just up the hill.

They are why we are here!

Because my family is fun.

Every single one of them.

And we eat really great food!

Except that I'm trying to be very conscientious about what is going in my face.

Which is hard.

Because we're camping.

And the snacks multiple before my very eyes.

Costco's miniature cinnamon rolls

It's It ice cream sandwiches

Gummy worms

14 flavors of Pringles

Sunflower seeds (currently eating ranch, dill pickle soon to follow)

Tortilla chips with lime

Flat bread dipped in spinach dip

Dove chocolates

Trader Joe's flax seed chips

Slim Jim beef jerky sticks

Cashews ("Please don't feed the bats cashews, they cost too much!" - yes, this was said this evening)

Pirate's Booty

Fruit snacks

And we have tapped into maybe 15% of our snack options...

So, yeah, good things (because I LOVE snacks!)

But it's hot and dirty and my kids are slobs which is evident by the half of the tent that has their dirty clothes strewn all across it despite the fact that there is a pop-up hamper in the middle of the tent. I am not in my element. I don't like living out of an ice chest for 6 days. I don't like having my clothes stick to me. I don't like climbing hills to go the bathroom. And I'm not a fan of public showers...ew. I miss my trailer: *sobbing!!* (For those of you who love tent camping: yay for you!! I do not love it and I am not ashamed of that.)

But I am doing this for two very good reasons. One of them is currently sleeping on my left and the other is sleeping on my right. My 2 kids are having a blast! They could care less about the dirt and the heat. They are running all over tarnation with their cousins (although they are missing the ones who couldn't make it this year) and they are eating all the junk and they are playing games with their aunties and uncles and grandma. 

I will put up with dirt and heat and tent camping if it means that my kids will have awesome memories of this trip with me and will create great memories with their cousins, aunties, uncles, and grandma. Because those things you can't buy. 

But those things you can give. 

Happy Camper,

KC

words 20 years later

I attended my 20th class reunion a couple of weeks ago (I know you're all wondering how I can be old enough to be attending a 20 year reunion, but it's because I graduated from high school when I was 10 years old...that sounds plausible, right?!) I found it interesting listening to stories and memories from my classmates and how negative many of those memories were...

It's amazing the baggage that we can carry for so many years. We must be so influential during our high school years because those words that were said to us and the deeds done - they stick! They shape us and haunt us for years to come. 

People, it's been 20 years and there are still scars being carried by myself and others who graduated with me. And the frightening thing for me is that, although I wasn't intentionally mean or vindictive as a high schooler, I probably said or did things that hurt others. 

I'm not the same person I was in high school, time and life have a funny way of changing a gal, but I still carry a small suitcase of hurts from that period of my life, and I know I'm not the only one who has that little suitcase packed, despite my maturity (because you'd think I could grow up and get over it, right?!). It's hard to let go. 

Words.

I'm in my mid-30's (I'm going to stay in my mid-30's until I'm 45...) and I am still learning the weightiness of my words. I try to make sure I hear my words through someone else's ears. And I try to be clear and concise in my wording. (Please take note of the word "try" because I fail a whole lot despite my efforts!) 

So here's my thought for today: Speaking should always require thinking first. 

No matter how old you are, no matter who you are talking to, always try to use tact. Because you never know what scars you might be creating for someone else. 

KC

holding me up

Today I held my 7-year-old son in my lap with his long arms tucked into my side and his gangly legs spilling over my lap while he sobbed. It was the sob of frustration and heartbreak that only a 7-year-old boy would cry about: a video game.

Or so I thought. 

When he had calmed down, he revealed his tenderheartedness. He was frustrated with himself because he had wasted his money on an app that ended up being one of those games where you have to keep purchasing the next episode in order to continue playing it. And as I tried to console him, I asked if maybe he'd like to do something with me, like play a card game and he said, "no," and started sobbing harder. He told me later that he was crying so hard because he had said no to me and thought he had hurt my feelings and felt so bad about it! 

Heart melted.

But I share all that, not because it's important to the story or to help make my point. I shared it because it was just too sweet not to.

And to my point: as he sat in my lap, it crossed my mind that this child would always be my child, even when he becomes an adult. I realized that someday I might hold him through a devastating loss or immense disappointment or dibilitating disease. That's heavy to think about. And I'm not sure I'm built to handle it. I'm certain I'm not. The thought of dealing with such deep loss for either of my children is beyond me.

But the worry doesn't consume me like it has the potential to do. Because looking back through the variety of things I've been through, I've always come through stronger on the other side. Not because I'm amazing or awesome or even close to great.

Only because I've never had to deal with the heavy on my own. Whatever I have needed, God has provided. 

When I couldn't understand the things that plagued me, He gave me perspective. 

When I couldn't handle the sadness, he gave me comfort and peace. 

When I've been at my wit's end, He's given me gentle reminders. 

When I didn't want to get out of bed, He gave me reasons.

He has always provided. Sometimes a lot, sometimes just enough.

So when I see glimpses of what the future might hold as I hang on to my children's hearts, and it looks scary, I just look at the past and know that I can handle that future, because I'm not doing it by myself. He's holding me up the entire way.

KC