JOY

It's been one crazy busy month. December hit and suddenly my to-do list quadrupled in length and time sped up at the same time - what's that all about?! So this week we finish school and I have no piano students so you'd think there'd be some time of rest...

HAHAHAHA! 

Nope.

Family sickness, child crabbiness, last minute gift shopping, Drs. appointments and BOOM: another day that was gone in just minutes. 

With the busy and quickly passing days, it's been difficult to maintain the holiday spirit. I light the Christmas candles, turn on the Christmas lights, listen to Christmas music, and eat the Christmas cookies, but I can't slow down the days that lead up to the big day. It's exhausting.

But you know what isn't lost? What can't be taken away? 

Joy!

Despite the busyness, the gift buying, the food preparation, the Christmas programs and parties, and whatever else may happen before the big day, it is all leading up to the most joyous celebration of all: the birth of a Savior!

People, I am a sinful, rotten creature. I do not deserve the gift of heaven. But I still get to go there because my Savior, celebrated on Christmas Day, took all that rotten, sinfulness upon himself and took the punishment for every bit of it so that I could be deemed worthy for heaven. JOY!!

That joy is ever-present, even when life gets out-of-control busy and exhausting. It lives in the depths of my soul and that joy fuels me. It is constant.

Joy to the world, the Lord has come! 

Yes! That is true Joy.

KC 

Easter - the best gift of Christmas (guest post by JB)

I was thinking that I should focus on Christmas this week because, well, Christmas! And lo and behold, a buddy of mine, whom I have been pestering to write for me as a guest blogger, sent me a great perspective on Christmas. Read this and then mentally applaud JB for sharing the true meaning, the deeper meaning of Christmas so clearly:  

So so close to Christmas, we celebrate the birth of Jesus. We celebrate by giving gifts, spending time with family and friends, let's not forget the FOOD!! 

For some of us, we look forward to the anticipation of what Christmas brings. For some it's much needed time off, others figuring out what needs to be done to stay away from the tax man. It's also stressful to some making sure every nephew or niece gets a gift or stocking stuffer, that every ingredient is on hand for the FOOD! (See my love for food) 

But tonight, at the Sounds of the Season concert at my church, Modesto CRC, (which if you missed.....make sure it's on your list of things to see next year. Amazing job by so many members of my church), I focused on Jesus's impending death. 

Why??? As I held that candle at the service and sang "Silent Night" I was overwhelmed with what it means that Jesus died on a cross for ME! I wanted it to be Easter. I realize that had Jesus never been born, we could never celebrate his death and resurrection. 

Maybe it's because I've been so busy at the farm, (it's hard being Farmer John) I've not been able to feel the joy of what Christmas brings. But what I've seen and heard while selling Christmas trees this year has made me see the despair that is so prevalent in some people. Worse yet, it's brought out bad stuff within me. I've been judgmental, irritable to others including my own family and wife that I love. So much temptation as well. We all know the usual temptations.  

But with Easter there is always a sense of renewal. We focus on all the bad things we do and think and ask forgiveness, whereas Christmas is celebrating Jesus birth. But think about the selfishness that happens. 

Maybe tonight was just what I needed to find the joy in Christmas. I am renewed, Jesus Christ is born!!! Alleluia!! 

JB

Show my buddy some appreciation for his reminder of how awesome Christmas is because it points to Easter. Thanks, JB, for sharing your words!

feel it

This morning in church, a gal sang a solo that gave me goosebumps through the entire song. Although she sang beautifully, but it wasn't her voice that caused the chills. It was the words of the song. The writer in me became absorbed in the choice of words that were used to portray meaning and emotion. Each phrase is powerful and moving. I was nearly moved to tears as I began to feel every word. 

Maybe it's just the linguistic geek in me, but can't you feel this song?!

(Free commentary provided by yours truly)

O Holy Night 

The stars are brightly shining

It is the night

Of our dear Savior's birth (if this doesn't set the setting for you...then read it again!)

Long lay the world

In sin and error pining (how heavy does that feel?!)

Til He appeared

And the soul felt its worth (the soul - your innermost, what makes you, you. Now your soul can breathe because you are not defined by your sin and error - the Savior came!)

A thrill of hope

The weary world rejoices ("thrill," "hope," "rejoices" - I've been weary, these words erase that weariness)

For yonder breaks

A new and glorious morn ("new", people! AND "glorious!" We are starting over!)

Fall on your knees (the amount of gratitude we should have for this Savior should make us physically fall to our knees) 

Oh hear the angel voices (I'm going to assume that "angel voices" are better than anyone who has appeared on American Idol or The Voice, in which case: wow!)

O night divine (how can you not be happy about the word "divine?" For some reason, the only thing I can think of right now as being divine is chocolate, but hey, that'd make for a pretty good night...)

O night when Christ was born (but this is quite a bit more divine than chocolate!)

O night divine

O night when Christ was born!

Can't you just FEEL it? Isn't your heart starting to swell and feel full?! 

Okay, so I might have gotten a little off track at the end of the song, but I wasn't actually there the night Christ was born and in order for me to even begin to imagine how amazing it must have felt, I have to liken it to my own experiences...like chocolate and The Voice, both of which are pretty amazing!

I geeked out even more and "researched" (in other words "Googled") the history behind this song. And in short (to quote beliefnet.com) it was originally written by a French "poet who later split from the church, given soaring music by a Jewish composer, and brought to Americans to serve as much as a tool to spotlight the sinful nature of slavery as tell the story of the birth of a Savior and it has become one of the most beautiful, inspired pieces of music ever created." At one point the song was banned from being sung in churches! Good thing God is bigger than us.

We've only got about 5 more days of Christmas music ahead of us (unless you're one of those strange ones who can listen to it all year round - I know a few of you types and I love you for it,  but I just can't 😳) and my hope for you all is that you don't just hear the music, but that you feel it. 

You know, goosebumps and all.

KC

I went looking for a link to this song on YouTube and, being partial to the talent of Southern Gospel performers, I found this video of the Collingsworth Family. Woah!: http://youtu.be/8wUbtuKZjWo 

just ask

Last night I had one of the most beautiful Christmas recitals since I started teaching piano lessons. It was magical! The whole thing took place in my family room and lasted under an hour.

I've been prepping for this thing for nearly 3 days. My husband was on a trip out of town for work so I was also doing the single-mom thing. (I'm giving out some major props right here to the single parents who have to do that for more than 5 days in a row!) 

I thought I was mentally ready to get this thing all together. I'm a strong and capable gal, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Until I started working on it and the to-do list kept growing and growing. And the heavy feeling of overwhelmingness (we're calling that a word today) set in. 

So you know what I did? It was very simple, actually. 

I asked for help. 

And I was overwhelmed in a completely different way. My friends and family stepped in and did whatever I needed. Caffeine delivery, crafty stuff, decorating, moving furniture, cleaning, setting up chairs, just being there. Everything got accomplished, even the items low on the priority list that I figured just wouldn't happen. It was beautiful!

I tend to think I can do everything on my own. It's a bit of an independence streak, I guess. Or stubbornness. Or possibly pride.  Hmmm, probably a bit of all three. I'm not very good at asking for help (and yet I love to help people - it blesses me to no end! Irony.) 

The truth is, I can't do everything on my own. But I often try to and end up stressed and frustrated. I could save myself so much worry and exhaustion simply by asking for help.

You ever think about how much easier life would be if you didn't have so much to do? 

Ever feel overwhelmed with your life, your kids, your emotions?

Maybe you are just plain exhausted. 

All the time. 

Just like me. (When I'm not, it's because of the ample amounts of caffeine - I'm not going to tell you how many Starbucks gift cards I received from my piano students for Christmas...😳)

Simple solution: ask for help. 

There are people, just like me, who are looking for opportunities to help. Believe it or not, we enjoy it! (Unless it involves cleaning the shower. Then I'm not going to enjoy it. We all have our weaknesses. Just sayin'.)

Sometimes your weariness can't be solved by the people around you. But there is a bigger source of help: our Father God. He doesn't even need you to speak words to understand you. Just an emotion-filled sigh is enough. 

You are never without help, friend. 

KC

a village

Many of you have met my girl, Jayne. If not personally, then through my words, emotions, frustrations, and irritations. She's ten. That's 10 years of earning every wrinkle that is etched into this face. I HAVE EARNED THEM, PEOPLE!

What I don't mention very often is what an incredible little girl my strong-willed Jayne truly is. Her heart is so big. She cares so deeply about everything (even annoying things like why we can't invite someone over to play at 8 pm on a school night or why I won't let her eat an entire bag of popcorn for breakfast. You'd be astounded at the amount of emotion that can be elicited regarding the simplest things. Sheesh. Wrinkles.) God created her with tenacity (great word - gotta remember to use that more often) and determination, a strong conscience (she admits wrong doings within the day, even if I had no clue they had transpired!), and passion (which is my nice way of saying dramatic). 

I tell you all of that to share about something completely different. Sorta.

I can't raise this kid on my own. She's too much. My husband and I together sometimes just shake our heads wondering what to do some days. The word "ridiculous" gets used a whole lot in our house by the adults. We try, believe me. We have read books, sought counseling, searched the Internet, listened to podcasts, prayed, and tried what seems like a million techniques, some successful, some not so much (like the time we took everything out of her room except enough clothing for a week, her bed with one blanket and one pillow and told her she needed to earn it all back. She didn't. Wrinkles.)

We aren't doing it alone. And that is why we are surviving. Obviously, we have an amazing source of strength and power from our Father, but He has also put people in our lives, as well as hers, to shape her and grow her right alongside us. Her aunts and uncles, grandparents and cousins all pour into her and pray for her (and us!) They love on her and correct her behavior and attitude. I have friends who think of ways to motivate her and talk with her about the choices she makes now and where that will take her in her future. I have friends who take her into their home and treat her as if she is also their daughter. And the neighborhood moms (and dads!) who step in to help her when I can't be there - goodness, we are blessed!

Ever since Jayne was very little, we realized that it would take a village to raise her. Not in the sense that we leave it up to the village to raise her because that would just make us irresponsible (even though there are days, I'll admit, when that sounds very appealing) . More in the sense that we have given key people, whom we trust and who care about our daughter, permission to guide her and teach her when we aren't present or just can't. (Just ask my mom - she's been there and stepped in during the "just can't" days!)

I don't know what we would do without this God-given village.

We are truly blessed.

Sending out mad love to our village. ❤️

Thank you for helping to shape our JayneeGirl into all the phenomenal things of paragraph #2. 

(See how I brought that back around? Smooth...)

KC

outside vs inside

My children are the most beautiful children to walk the planet. Gorgeousness oozes from them. No other child can compare. And I'm totally allowed to say that because I'm their mom. And if you ask their dad, he'll agree completely! 

Ok, so we all feel this way about our children. My daughter has the most beautiful strawberry blonde hair with the perfect sprinkling of freckles across her nose, just under her bright blue eyes. That hair gets people's attention and she gets complimented on it regularly. 

Tonight I was snuggling with her in bed and I started a conversation with her about physical beauty. Well, apparently I have been doing my job because partway into the conversation I said, "Having people compliment you about your physical beauty is a nice thing, but..." and she finished off my sentence for me: "real beauty comes from the inside, Mom."

My heart burst with pride for a split second - she knows the truth! But we talked and elaborated a bit more, because it is easy to get caught up in outside beauty and forget the inside completely. She's only 10. She has a lot of time to be influenced by this world that distracts from creating a beautiful heart by focusing on a pretty face and body.

Real beauty, in my opinion, can often be seen in someone's eyes. It just shines out of them. (Eyes are the window to the soul, right?)

These people that you find yourself drawn to are kind, friendly, thoughtful, and caring. They have a heart for people. They are generous. They care less about themselves and more about the people around them. 

The heart of a person is their most attractive feature. 

Teach this to your children, my friends! 

But know this for yourself, too. 

Your heart makes you beautiful.

Can you imagine how much more beautiful our world would be if we were truly searching for and creating beauty in the right places?!

For God sees not as man sees for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7 

KC

*I'm aware that I used the word "beauty" in various forms in this blog more than 10 times. I wasn't trying to be redundant, just focused. 

Focused on your beautiful beauty! 😁

emotions

Women tend to be emotional. 

This is news to you all, I'm sure. 

Huge shocker.

Every great once in a while, once in a rare blue moon, we get a tad bit, just a smidge, not very much, just a little, over-emotional. But that's okay because it's super rare.

And if we are going to be perfectly honest, because that's totally what I'm being, women are not the only ones who can be emotional. I've known plenty of guys who bring their emotions to the table on a regular basis. 

Unfortunately, emotions often get a bad rap. Decisions should be made with logic. Emotions get in the way. They distract from the main point. Let's figure this out based on numbers and graphs and charts...

I'm going to go ahead and stand up for the validity of emotions right now. 

Emotions are God-given. I believe they come not only from our heart, but our very souls. 

I think that sometimes our heart and soul understand things better than our brain.

Sometimes we feel what we cannot completely understand or put into words.

Sometimes it's stronger than it needs to be, I'll admit to that in my own self. 

But typically there is a reason behind the emotions we feel, even if we can't express the "why."

A good friend of mine used to tell me years ago that just because my emotions might be over dramatic once in a while, that didn't make them invalid. They were still real feelings that deserved to be given attention.

Since her enlightening, I have learned how to control my emotions better (although becoming a mom brought out a whole new set to figure out!) but I have also learned to examine them so I can figure out where they stem from. It helps me vocalize them more logically when I've had some time to think about them! 

Emotions are a beautiful thing. 

God gave them to each of us for a purpose.

They have the potential to bring beauty and balance to a relationship.

Take time to figure them out and embrace them.

Emotions have brought about many beautiful things in our home.

KC