I don't have the words...

There have been some hard posts to write, and this one is right up there with those.  Not only is what I'm writing about difficult, but because I'm still in shock, I'm struggling for words.

On Tuesday morning, my father-in-law suddenly passed away from a heart attack. I received the phone call from my mother-in-law and then had to make the difficult phone call to Scott, my husband. 

(Another reason why this is difficult is because many of you are close friends of Scott and I, and are hearing about this for the first time. Because how do I just post my father-in-law's passing on social media without absorbing the shock myself and without it being a shock to others? It's impossible.)

I'm familiar with death. And I should be familiar with the shock of it. 

But I'm not.

My own Pa passed onto heaven 9 years ago.

But Bob was my dad too.

He loved me and cared for me as his own daughter (even though he didn't have any daughters of his own, he did a great job of being a father to me!)

He respected me.

He encouraged me.

He listened to me.

He was considerate of me.

He was interested in me and what I had to say.

He valued what I brought to the family.

And I have always been family to him.

I thought maybe I knew how to deal with this sudden shock, but I don't. 

It's brand new all over again.

And I'll never get used to it.

KC