thorns and heaping coals

So you know when you have someone in your life who feels like a thorn but you can't get rid of them and you have to deal with them everyday and you cannot see an end in sight for dealing with all their garbage and it just plain stinks? And you just want to be a thorn right back to them or quit your job or the relationship or run far, far away? 

Rotten deal, I know.

But that is life.

Sometimes you can make changes that dismiss this person from your life. But sometimes you can't. And then you have a choice.

Let their thorny-ness ruin your life. 

Or not.

So what I discovered in seeking out scriptures to support this idea turned out to be pretty stinkin' rad (and I use the word "rad" to bother my niece who thinks it shouldn't be used anymore/again and I utterly disagree because I think it is an awesome word and because I'm getting old and I just don't care). 

In Proverbs 25:21-22 it says this: "if your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. For so you will heap coals of fire on his head, and The Lord will reward you." 

In my mind I always thought: "Ha! Kill 'em with kindness!!" Some kind of vengeful feeling always accompanied that scripture in my mind...

But in reading a little more in depth today I discovered a little different meaning. I will simplify what I read because it's late and that is reason enough. Essentially, by heaping coals upon the head and heart, the idea is to burn away all ill will so that they will be compelled to love you. And yet another gem: for or not to consume but to melt away into kindness. 

That completely changed the mental picture I held in my mind! So instead of someone's mean face kinda melting away, I now see all their yuckiness (I apologize for that but "yuckiness" is the only word that is coming to this mommy's mind) just sort of melting away and a big broad smile breaking out on their face. 

So instead of returning evil for evil, maybe it's time to heap coals of kindness upon them and see where that takes you.

All I know is that if someone brought me Starbucks on a regular basis and fresh flowers every couple of weeks, amd volunteered to babysit my kids once a week, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be able to hate them for very long...

KC

And lest you think you might possibly be the thorn I am writing about, don't worry, you're not. I was just prompted to write about this and so I did.