When I was growing up, my neighbors were my friends. I'd play basketball in the front yard with the boys next door. We'd play frisbee back and forth across the street with our other neighbors. The older couple on our left always gave me candy when we stopped by. My parents kept an eye on the neighbor's home if they went on vacation, collected their newspapers and their mail. They did the same for us. We kiddos respected the adults and their property. We borrowed sugar, butter, and eggs from each other. We'd go over for BBQs and play cards together. That's just what neighbors do!
Nowadays, that's a hard thing to come by. I will say that a few of the neighbors in our current neighborhood are absolutely wonderful. The kids play out in the court together with one of the adults keeping an eye on them. We get together to have dinner together. We borrow sugar from each other. We loan out tables and chairs for events at each other's houses. We let the neighbor know when their sprinkler isn't working, or we just fix it for him. We meet in the street to have a conversation for a bit. We tell our kids to mind the adults and to be nice to the other kids in the neighborhood, their friends.
But then there's the neighbor whose dog constantly barks. The other neighbor who never comes out of his house. The one who won't look you in the eye when you drive by, trying to wave. The one who spies and listens to your conversations. The neighbors who blare their outdoor stereo for a party that lasts all night that they never warned you about. The one who trims his tree so all the branches land in your yard and never offers to pick them up. And then there's the one who lived next to my mom and stole important items from her storage shop in the backyard. And the pit bull (this particular one was vicious) running around her yard, trying to attack her through her sliding glass door.
I'm sure you can think of many other annoying things that your neighbors have done. I'm sure I've done a few annoying things as a neighbor. But what stinks is that respectfulness and friendliness seem to be missing from many neighborhoods. The attitude of "this is my house and I'm going to do what I want" seems to reign these days. I can deal with the pettiness and the minimal annoyances in my neighborhood (like I said before, we've got some excellent neighbors!) But what do you do when your neighbors are not neighborly but more of a nuisance?
I don't have a great answer. Obviously the big stuff has to be handled. You have rights and the right to communicate them. My father-in-law has written notes to neighbors about their dogs incessant barking. He's chatted with other neighbors who have not turned down their music into the night, just reminding them politely that the noise travels directly into his bedroom windows. My mom has had to call the police about the items stolen from her shop. Other friends have called the city to make sure that the intrusive additions to their neighbor's home are being built according to code. (I was taught that you should be polite and respectful, but not a doormat).
But I'm wondering: just because someone isn't neighborly to us, does that mean we shouldn't be neighborly to them? There's a verse that I have had my kids memorize (and if you haven't heard of this one, well... that's just crazy) and it hangs above my staircase in my house so my kids see it every day. Not that they read it every day, but at least it's there in hopes that they will!
"Do to others as you would have them do to you." (Luke 6:31) You know, the golden rule.
You can't change your neighbors, but you can change yourself. And who knows, maybe your good attitude, your smiles and waves, the kind deeds you do might just rub off on the rest of the neighborhood.
KC
No comments:
Post a Comment